How We Greet Others Says A Lot About Us

As an old (read former) English major, I love "etymology" - finding out where words come from and what they actually mean. Lately, I've be struck by how hollow our "hello" is. Basically, it has no meaning but is simply "a shout to attract attention" that was used by Alexander Graham Bell when he first answered the telephone.

Contrast this with "namaste", a sanskrit word which means "all that it best in me salutes all that is best in you" or "I bow to you. The light in me honors the light within you". Some people have further defined the word as meaning "the god in me greets the god in you". Now that's a greeting!!!

How about what they say in eastern Tibet? "Tashi delay" which means "I honor the greatness in you. I honor the place in you where lives your courage, honor, love, hope and dreams." Wow!!

And instead of a handshake, which is a holdover from medieval times when you offered your empty hand to show that you did not have a sword in it, they bow in respect to one another, placing their hands in what is understood in any culture as a gesture of prayer- palms together, fingers raised to the heavens in the middle of the chest over their heart.

I wish I had the courage to be totally counter cultural and simply start to greet all my customers, friends and family with the more intimate greetings of the east. I really do believe that small changes like this might bring some civility back to our culture. But... alas, I have a business to run and I'm afraid folks would surely think I had totally lost it. This might work in California but the midwest rust belt - not so much.

However, what I can do is be present enough at each juncture in my day that I look at the person I am speaking to and say inwardly to that person, "namaste" or "tashi delay". I can look at them with enough respect to say, "the light in me greets the light in you". My bet is that in doing so, the way I treat them will change.

Who knows? Maybe, I will be bold. Isn't it sad that it is a difficult choice to be more loving?

Einstein said it best. "How many people are trapped in their everyday habits: part numb, part frightened, part indifferent? To have a better life we must keep choosing how we are living."

Pollyanna Had It Right

When I was growing up, my dad would often fault me for being such a "Pollyanna" and would suggest that he had never met anyone who was so "simple minded". Truth be known, like any good dad, he was simply trying to make sure that I wouldn't get hurt by being too trusting.

But the reality is that Pollyanna had it right. Simply by always looking for the good in people and in situations, she transformed an entire town and the people in it from a curmugeon's hide-a-way into a pleasant place to live. She accomplished this amazing feat by simply refusing to see the "dark side".

It would seem to me that we could use some of that unbridled optomism, or what people are calling positivity, right now. The truth is that what we given our attention to, we create both for ourselves and for our world. So isn't it about time that we focused on what is good and right instead of what is bad and wrong.

There is a wonderful story that emerges from the American Indian tradition. An old brave was telling his grandson that within every person there is a fight going on between two wolves. One is mean, cruel, pessimistic and hopeless. The other is joyful, optomistic, loving and hopeful. The little boy asked his grandfather, "So, which one wins?" To which the wise old man replies, "the one you feed".

It's time to stop feeding that negative side of ourselves. Turn off the 24/7 news channels and the talking - or more often, screaming - heads for a while. Take a newspaper "fast" for a week or two. Vow to look for the good in everyone you meet - especially the ones who grate on your last nerve. Be Pollyanna for a little while. You will be happier and so will everyone around you.